Shalom

This year, I’m giving myself space. Space to rest, space to heal both mentally and physically, space to grow, and space to let go. New Years resolutions are great… but not for me.

I’m more about any time resolutions, or every day resolutions. I would advocate that if there’s something you want to change…start today…and commit to whatever that is for the long haul, not just January. I do, however, think the new year is a good mental reset. It spurs the contemplation and consideration of dreams, goals, and desires. It provides a good platform to identify areas of desired improvement and motivation to implement changes. However, by March, how many of those “resolutions” are still fresh on our mind? How many people continue to chase their “resolutions” mid and end-year?

Each year our church participates in a 21-day fast with intentions to reset your mind. As with typical fasting, each person is to give up something that will be replaced with an intentional focus on God. There’s so much I love about this (albeit the last two years we have traveled directly in the middle of this delaying our start time). Namely, the fact that you’re in community with others makes it more successful. When you have a group, a team, an accountability partner, or even are just cognizant that someone else is aware of a goal or commitment, you are more likely to strive to attain that goal. Whatever goals you have, find a team, find a person, or even just write those goals down, and you’re more likely to be successful. Studies show that simply writing down your goals makes you twice as likely to achieve them!

This year is a bit different for me. This year, my so called “resolution” and my reset is totally centered upon peace and rest. Shalom is the word that I’m drawn towards. Weeks ago I would have questioned whether I knew the accurate definition of that word. After the same word appearing in my personal reading and study time numerous times, I dug deep into the meaning and found confirmation of that word in my life right now.

Shalom is the Hebrew which translates loosely into the word ‘peace’, however the word shalom implies a completeness or wholeness. The word shalom has a deeper meaning than just the absence of conflict (as peace is most often defined), shalom goes further to express feelings of safety, fullness, completeness, or soundness. A quick search for the etymology of the word, and you’ll find that it’s related to the Hebrew word shelem and shulam, which mean to ‘pay for’ and ‘to be fully paid for’. As I studied this word, I was struck with the connection that this word conjures a peace that can be only found through Jesus, Yahweh, who fully paid our debts in which we can find full peace; shalom. Talk about a magnificent love, the true way through life and peace… is nothing less than Jesus.

I say this to inspire you not to get caught up in a list of must-do, must change, must be better than, but this year to possibly focus on must love, must accept, must appreciate. You are where you are right now in your life for a reason, and you are enough. I’m not objecting to goal setting. Be a goal getter and a goal achiever; but do so with grace! Be nice to yourself, give yourself patience, give yourself space, give yourself freedom to be who you are. A better you begins with being nicer and less critical of yourself. It’s okay this year, to focus more on the internal than the external if that’s what you choose. So with those thoughts in mind, here are simple ways that I’m creating space for peace in my own life.

1. Create a morning routine. Creating quiet time for myself each and every morning. When I start my day with God, I tend to include him in most all my actions. The way I think, speak, and act is changed because of who He is.
2. Be kind to yourself, intentionally. I’m my own worst critic. I need no one else to point out my flaws or identify room for improvement because I do a fantastic job of that on my own. Yet, I’m over that. Instead of complaining about my physical body, I’ll be thankful for the two amazing babies I’ve birthed and that I’m healthy enough to enjoy my 30’s and be able to chase them all day every day. I don’t workout to look a certain way, I work out to live a certain way. I invest in my health so that I can cary my toddler and the grocery bags, so that I can dance around with my son, and chase my children in the backyard. While I’m busy doing that, I’ll be grateful for all the things my body can do, and how amazing it is that He created us with such beauty. I’ll be nice to myself and invest in myself, because I have a daughter and a son who are watching and I want them to love themselves without conditions.
3. Get rid of excess. Purge clutter, and in a few weeks/months, do it again! I like physical space to add to my mental clarity. Clean lines, clean spaces, clean thoughts. Another tip here is to subscribe to a service that quickly helps you organize and delete junk emails. It’s a trivial task, but it’s a huge time saver. Unroll.me is my favorite, it allows me to clean up my inbox and ensure that I don’t miss important emails while removing the junk, and that friends…creates mental space.
4. Learn to say “no”. This is huge challenge for me. I am a yes person but at this time in my life, with two very small children, it’s not reasonable that I can say yes to every good thing that comes my way. I have vowed to prioritize my “yes” and to add “no” to my vocabulary. It’s okay if I don’t have all the time or resources to help, volunteer, or attend every opportunity.
5. Less screen time. If you ask my friends or husband, they will probably tell you I’m the worst about responding to texts or calls. This is because I keep my phone away from me during the day, sometimes intentionally. I’m far too busy with my kiddos to get lost in social media for any portion of the day. So if you text or call and don’t get me, I’m busy making memories with my kiddos, but don’t worry, I’ll get back to you.
6. Reading for personal growth. If I have set one “goal” to accomplish this year, it’s to read more books (and/or listen to more Podcasts) about personal growth, and now that I’ve found out that Alexa can read to me from my Kindle library while I’m accomplishing things around the house, I’m super excited about what I can add to this list.
7. Be flexible. I am a planner by nature. I like to know what, when, and where; and I like it to happen relatively close to that way. However, it’s time I give myself and others more grace. Everything doesn’t have to happen according to schedule or plan. Some of the best moments are the spontaneous or unplanned, and that’s okay!

So this year, whether you plan on totally overhauling everything, or changing nothing; strive to be kind. Give yourself and others grace. Focus on Him, and find time to focus on yourself. A new year doesn’t have to mean a new you; in fact you’re probably close to practically perfect in every way. (Thanks Mary Poppins and movie night with my girl). Perfection is overrated. Here’s to peace.

XOXO,

Kristy